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No sex is not an excuse for Divorce (rebuttle to responses)
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No sex is not an excuse for Divorce (rebuttle to responses) Ok, i'm posting this blog to respond to each of comments that seemed to make the least sense. I would have done this ON my actual thread but: reason 1, i checked up on the thread a day later and its already old; reason 2, as a standard member i need to upgrade before i respond to a comment. So without further delay here are my responses. Dear unique7369: this comment probably made the most sense out of any i have read. I understand its hard to keep faithful to someone who ignores you sexually especially since it takes a longer time to live it then to remenisce about it. And the answer is "No, my parents are a happy couple who have been married for 25 years. Although in my generation, all you have to do is look to the right or left of you to find someone who does have divorced parents" Dear Mandabee1982: I can agree with the first half of your comment....right up to the part where you say that "staying 'together' for the sake of your will only make things worse". I have a friend who's parents are still married, still live in the same house and even date other people from time to time and the are fine although the parents do not get along. And the my friend...is fine, not depressed (infact, she is one of those annoyingly happy types). However, every single i know that has had divorced parents will resent at least one of the two. Often times the will become a weapon to hurt the other too, such as i have one friend who's father became rich after the divorce and so constantly gives the money when she visits and buys her things. This made her to resent her mom for not being able to afford rich things, and now won't even talk to her. I understand this are individual examples but believe me i have WAY more that i wont bother to list here. Dear dimples565: BY FAR THE COMMENT THAT ANNOYED ME THE MOST. What's to say that a 19 year old who has never been married can't be right about something he has never experienced? I can tell you that robbing a bank is wrong and that nobody should ever do it without actually having to rob a bank. Would you question me about my reasoning there even though i never robbed one??? You wrote "You want to quote part of the wedding vows fine but find out what the rest is. To love honor and cherish. THat means youmake yourself sexually available to your spouse. " I just want an explanation as to why the heck you think "to honor and cherish" means having sex with your spouse. Those words are meant that you are to respect and value highly of them, heck look up them in a dictionary sometime. As far as " suffer more from divorce because there is no longer the income to provide for them the way it used to be". What a steaming pile of B.S. First off, do you really believe that all a parent does is provide money for their ??? Divorce effects WAY more than you could possibly of thought of. If you want proof, take a look at the facts: Divorce has DRAMATICALLY increased within the last few decades. Also, over the last few decades artist such as musicians, poets, and fine artists have been leaning toward a much more depressing feel. In fact, there has become an entire genre of "depressing i want to cut my wrists" type of people. Don't believe me? Try googling "emo" and see what you find. Oh, and yes i know i don't make the laws in our states. But then again, who ever said that there needs to be laws written down for us to know what is right and wrong? Dear ArealUnicorn: Another interesting debate. I can't say that no sex isn't SOME form of abuse, and yet there are virgins still out there who are into there 20's and 30's that i've heard about. They haven't killed themselves yet so i see that it can't be all that bad. As for "being turned down over and over again, i think i would rather be punched," i CAN actually image it, infact, i can do better than that. Do you have any idea how many times a man has gotten rejected b4? I know ive been rejected way more than i'd like to admit and yet i still keep on trying. The fact is that i think so much people sympathize that the irrationality of it all has dissappeared. I mean, i wrote this whole question to find at least ONE person who tried it all and had there relationship not work and still couldnt find one, yet i get a million people bitching to me about how i don't know how it feels because ive never experienced it so i shouldn't judge. It's about time, someone judged. Dear Sweetpea202067: Sadly sweetpea, sex isn't a form of communication. Otherwise, everyone would at least know the name of the person they had sex with by the end of the night. Dear WIzzyboiy: Wow, someone give this man an award. I finally found someone i can agree with completely. Glad to see this whole world hasn't gone crazy. Dear 2daycowboywanted: "The wonders of being young. You may come to realize thatonce you get older you really didnt know all that much whenyou thought that you did." I guess everyone thinks they are living right when they are the ones living it. All i can say is that when we all were we lived without care and were happy. When we "matured" into the age that you all care to think is a respectable age most of your become depressed about one thing or another. However, when you look at all the wise elder people, they all seem happy. And when you ask them why they say that they never stopped acting like a . When you ask them who is the most ignorant people living they will say its the adults because they stress about things that aren't important in life. So i ask you, who is the smarter one? The happy older person who acts like a or the stressed out, sad adult? Dear Daddysbadgirl38: "in all likelihood, you yourself will end up divorced from your mate at least once in your life". You must be a realist. Statistically, the odds are against me (what is it 60% divorced now??) but if today's society ever DOES regain its morals then hopefully it won't be so easy to divorce (and it IS easy to divorce, proof is how common people will divorce and then remarry, and then divorce...etc.) And for the last time...NO, my parents are not divorced... Dear Optimystk43: I'm glad to hear that you agree with my debate. I'm sorry you had to grow up in a broken home, but at least you can attest to others the pain of growing up in one. I'm sorry if i didnt get to comment about everyone. I felt a few things to be repetitive for me to say so i decided not to. Just know that i spent a long time carefully reading each individuals response and trying my best to see things from their point of view. I have to say though that I am extremely dissapointed that i could not find ONE person who tried all of the things mentioned on my article and still found luck. I take it that everyone on here that chose to respond with anger has been divorced at somepoint or another for the reason mentioned. This is not to say that non of these people tried to keep the relationship going...i think it only shows the true strength and passion of your love for your partner that you refused to attempt every possible way rekindle that spark that you left. I'm sorry that your relationship didnt work but all i can say is hopefully the next time you decide to get married (if you do) you will spend a little more time trying to pick your soulmate and maybe have a little more perserverance with it. |
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