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Blogs > peekabooicu2ucme > Musings and mayhem of my mind

Timeline of my mental illness  

peekabooicu2ucme 46F
3728 posts
4/20/2016 10:22 am
Timeline of my mental illness
I saw this meme awhile back that said something to the effect of beiing able to track ones mental illness via a timeline of their exes. I couldn't debate it too much. I kinda think its more of a tracking my innocence and naivity though. First man I fucked I married. Same with second. Then I stopped marrying them and just tried to figure it all out. Drank a lot, experimented a bit, and learned more than I think I wanted to know. I've been asked 5 times for marriage. Its kinda fucked up seeing what it meant to them vs what it meant to me. I love with everything I've got when someone captures my heart. But I've been taken for granted and scarred deeply every time. When it comes down to it now, I don't ask for anything but good companionship and great sex. Not a lot to ask for in my opinion. Be good to me, be good to my minions, have some fun, share some laughs and fuck me silly. Just don't hurt anyone or lie. I take care of me and us. Anyone I let in is in a spot that can be kept or not. It all depends on his behavior and sincerity. I almost miss being innocent with all of the jaded thoughts and feelings I have now, but I'm moving forwards, not backwards in this life. I'm falling for someone that hasn't been in this kind of position ever before. Spared the pain of trial and error with a marriage that ended in the pain instead of death, not divorce. I'm so used to the man mentality that I feel I've met a treasure. I am scared of my feelings. But I'm not afraid of his. Call this cautious optomism, because I can't allow myself to be too afraid to jump.

Come visit me too peekabooicu2ucme
citizen4722 66M  
74582 posts
4/20/2016 3:30 pm

 I sincerely hope your treasure will be very rewarding for you


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