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For Lovers...of Language...The Big Five!
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For Lovers...of Language...The Big Five! This evening as I prepare for the arrival of my lover Sam from Bend, OR (the one who has the co-starring roles with me in BendOverIn My Storage Unit 2, BendOverIn My Storage Unit, Part 1 quotBendOver I39ll drivequot, Bring heels Part 2 BendOver I39ll drive, Part 3 BendOver I'll drive, Part 4 BendOver I39ll drive, Part 5 BendOver I39ll drive , Part 6 Finally the Sex BendOver I39ll drive), I am thinking about language and, particularly the idea of "The Five Languages of Love." First, let me go on record as saying I don't like the word "lover." Rather arch, It smacks of pretension but I can't find another word I like better. He might refer to me as his "friend" to his other friends but I know what that means (and also what it means when he refers to other women as his friends). Fuck Buddy, which implies casual friends who fuck, doesn't quit fit where we are. Neither does boyfriend/girlfriend. We are mature people exploring where our interest in one another goes with a third visit in six weeks. Okay, so I'll use the word "lover" and get over it. Now, let me check the oven for the chicken I'm roasting with sliced garlic cloves under the skin, stuffed with lemon and rosemary. It smells divine. Whew! I caught the grilled bell pepper, portabella mushroom, onion, pasilla chiles and eggplant just in time. I'm not planning on a huge meal this evening. I'm stocking up for the days ahead. I'll just bring cantaloupe and ripe figs wrapped in prosciutto to greet him at the airport in case he needs some calories before I start fucking the life out of him. Ahem. I'm not a gourmet chef though I am quite a foodie. Great food flavors rival my love of cock. But, what I'm doing is not about the food. It's about Act of Service. One of the smart things I did (while taking a break from fucking) during my last visit to Bend was read aloud the questions to my lover Sam from the online quiz on "The Five Languages of Love" (5L  and get his responses. What it did is that it clarified that for each of us what reads as caring is when someone provides Acts of Service for us. Someone does something to take care of our needs and make us happy.The 5LL are: * Acts of Service * (Words of) Affirmation ("I love you. You're special to me") * Touch (non-sexual) * Quality Time Together * Gifts (physical presents that signify someone was thinking of you). I consider these "love languages" important because most of us give what we like to receive. The good thing is Sam and I have as our #1 item: Acts of Service. The stuff he did for me --preparing food, hauling his SUP board to the river for me, setting up a storage unit sex scene in advance, packing me food for the flight home-- made me incredibly happy. Interesting to note is that his second one is Affirmation while mine is touch. The quiz forces one to pit each of the options against the other. As I heard him choose ANYTHING over touch, I got an insight, "His not touching me in public and not being all touchy/feely, it's not personal. It's just not his thing." In fact, Touch ranked last for him while it's second for me. Because he likes to offer Acts of Service extending himself for non-sexual touch may be something he can do. I'm conscious of making an effort to speak my appreciation of him because Affirmation registers with him. The other thing I've spent a lot of time doing today is "staging" the house for sex everywhere. An Act of Service, it's been a ton of fun for me, creating a huge surge of anticipatory shivers as I place heels near the Function Specific Design (FSD) Chairs I bought with fucking in mind. FSD --narrow base and high back-- is his trademark. When I wear heels straddling him (as he directed me to do in "Wear Heels") I can grind to my pussy's great delight. So I don't forget in my oxytocin-induced haze, here are the topics on my mind for upcoming blogs: * Clothing that Flatters the Mature Slut * Poly = Honesty. How do I tell the truth with both courage and kindness? Oh, the point of this blog in case my anticipatory quivers obscured it: I recommend checking out "The Five Languages of Love" quiz to understand what speaks to you...and to your lover. It's free and easy to find with a search engine. {=}{=}{=} BiPolyBabe69 |
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Good food can lead to good sex. I agree with you about the word "lover". Why not friend? Or close friend? Anyway, it sounds like a great evening and I hope it's everything you hoped it would be. Good food = good cock. *S* Bud Always Ready for Fun.
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