WOMEN AND THEIR BUMPER STICKERS
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Posted:Nov 12, 2007 6:01 pm
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2016 7:33 pm
1756 Views
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1. SO MANY MEN, SO FEW WHO CAN AFFORD ME
2. DONT TREAT ME ANY DIFFERENTLY THAN YOU WOULD THE QUEEN.
3. NEXT MOOD SWING: TIMECHECK: 6 MINUTES.
4. IF YOU WANT BREAKFAST IN BED, SLEEP IN THE KITCHEN.
5. PUT ON YOUR BIG GIRL PANTIES AND DEAL WITH IT.
6. CAUTION!!! I CAN GO FROM 0 TO BITCH IN 2.5 SECONDS.
7. I UNDERSTAND THE CONCEPT OF COOKING AND CLEANING. JUST NOT AS IT APPLIES TO ME.
8. WELL LA-DE-FUCKING-DA
9. HONEY LEMME TELL YA, INNER BEAUTY WONT GET U LAID.
10. THEY CALL IT PMS BECAUSE MAD COW DISEASE WAS ALREADY TAKEN.
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Quick sex ed...
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Posted:Nov 12, 2007 5:11 pm
Last Updated:Jan 23, 2009 8:51 pm
1757 Views
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A mother is in the kitchen making dinner for her family when her walks in.
Mommy, where do babies come from?
The mother thinks for a few seconds and says, Well dear, Mommy and Daddy fall in love and get married. One night they go into their bedroom, they kiss and hug and have sex.
The looks puzzled so the mother continues, That means the daddy puts his penis in the mommys vagina. Thats how you get a baby, honey. The seems to comprehend.
Oh, I see, but the other night when I came into your room you had daddys penis in your mouth. What do you get when you do that?
Jewelry, my dear. Jewelry
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THE CREATION OF KITTY KAT
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Posted:Nov 12, 2007 8:12 am
Last Updated:Nov 29, 2008 6:13 pm
1794 Views
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Seven wise men with knowledge so fine,
created a pussy to their design.
First was a butcher,
with smart wit,
using a knife,
he gave it a slit,
Second was a carpenter,
strong and bold,
with a hammer and chisel,
he gave it a hole,
Third was a tailor,
tall and thin,
by using red velvet,
he lined it within,
Fourth was a hunter,
short and stout,
with a piece of fox fur,
he lined it without,
Fifth was a fisherman,
nasty as hell,
threw in a fish and gave it a smell,
Sixth was a preacher,
whose name was McGee,
he touched it and blessed it,
and said it could pee,
Last was a sailor,
dirty little runt,
he sucked it and fucked it,
and called it a cunt.
BY: SOME GUY NAMED LUIS
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Little Timmy and misconceptions...
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Posted:Nov 12, 2007 7:54 am
Last Updated:Nov 27, 2007 11:33 pm
1671 Views
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It is a bright Monday morning and little Timmy is off to school. Timmy has brought his cat to school today even though it is not show and tell. The teacher approaches Timmy, he is crying loudly by now and hugging his cat. She asks him what is wrong. Little Timmy replies this morning i heard daddy whispering to mommy at breakfast, i dont think i was supposed to hear. He said "Baby im gonna eat that pussy today when Timmy goes to school."
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THE NEW WAY TO APPROVE A MAN/Like a Credit Application
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Posted:Nov 2, 2007 12:05 pm
Last Updated:Feb 27, 2016 7:33 pm
1950 Views
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Name
Last First Middle
Address:
Address City State Zip
Telephone: Home # Work# Cell#
Date of Birth: Age SS#
Weight Height:
Ethnicity: (check) Black Hispanic White Other
Do you live with any of the following: (circle)
Grandmother Parents Mother Father Girlfriend Baby Mama Alone Shelter Wife Auntie Boyfriend Other
Any (circle yes or no)
Yes No If yes, how many
How many Baby Mamas? If more than one, please name below.
Use separate sheet of paper if need more room.
1.
2.
3.
Ever been married (circle ) Yes No If yes, how many times?
Are you or have you ever been on the Down Low? (circle one) Yes No (If you answer "Yes" STOP RIGHT HERE !!)
Do you owe support? Yes No Don't Know
*If your ex-wife is getting state benefits (childcare, food stamps, etc), then you owe somebody something. Especially tax payers. Stop here and go take care of your dang .
Education:
Did you graduate from high school? (circle ) Yes No Name of high school (if yes)
Have you received any of the following? (Circle One) GED Diploma Nothing
*If you did not complete any of the above, please Stop here and return to school.
Any college? (circle one) Yes No Still Enrolled: Yes No Graduated
Have you ever been to jail? (circle one) Yes No If yes, what for? (be very specific)
Have you ever been to prison? (circle one) Yes No
*If you have answered yes to the above question, please Stop here and call your P.O. immediately.
Employed? (circle) Yes No *If no, please Stop here?
If yes, where and how long?
Do you have health insurance? Yes No
When did you last visit the dentist?
When was the last time you have been to the doctor? _ Yes No What for?
List any (all) illnesses. Use separate sheet of paper if needed.
Do you have or have you had any of the following? (please circle all that may apply)
Hepatitis
A or B or C Herpes Mononucleosis HIV/AIDS The Bird Flu West Nile Virus Crabs
Chlamydia Gonorrhea SARS Head Lice Ringworms Boils Sex Change Shingles Meningitis Measles Mumps Ebola Bunions Virus A Cold Something that you can't spell Depression Schizophrenia
*If you have circled any of these, Stop here do NOT turn in your application. See the doctor immediately!
Do you or have you ever used (ingested in any way) any of the following: (circle all that apply)
Crack/Cocaine Heroin Paint Markers Ecstasy Glue Bad pills Snuff Anything under the kitchen sink
*Please use a separate sheet of paper to compile a list of goals and accomplishments.
By signing below, you agree that all of the information given above is true to the best of your knowledge.
For my protection, you may be asked to provide the following information upon request: state ID, birth certificate, recent payroll stub, a recent clean bill of health from a certified physician or practitioner.
Falsifying information may result in termination of this relationship (if applicable), and a severe a** whooping by my project cousins Pookie, Ray-Ray, Darnell, Lil Krazy or all of the above.
Dont know who wrote it but its funny as hell
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To link to this blog (CURIOUSWIKITTY) use [blog CURIOUSWIKITTY] in your messages.
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