|
|
No sex is not an excuse for Divorce (rebuttle to responses)
|
Posted:Sep 6, 2006 9:28 pm
Last Updated:Apr 27, 2024 4:44 pm
6141 Views
|
Ok, i'm posting this blog to respond to each of comments that seemed to make the least sense. I would have done this ON my actual thread but: reason 1, i checked up on the thread a day later and its already old; reason 2, as a standard member i need to upgrade before i respond to a comment. So without further delay here are my responses.
Dear unique7369: this comment probably made the most sense out of any i have read. I understand its hard to keep faithful to someone who ignores you sexually especially since it takes a longer time to live it then to remenisce about it. And the answer is "No, my parents are a happy couple who have been married for 25 years. Although in my generation, all you have to do is look to the right or left of you to find someone who does have divorced parents"
Dear Mandabee1982: I can agree with the first half of your comment....right up to the part where you say that "staying 'together' for the sake of your will only make things worse". I have a friend who's parents are still married, still live in the same house and even date other people from time to time and the are fine although the parents do not get along. And the my friend...is fine, not depressed (infact, she is one of those annoyingly happy types). However, every single i know that has had divorced parents will resent at least one of the two. Often times the will become a weapon to hurt the other too, such as i have one friend who's father became rich after the divorce and so constantly gives the money when she visits and buys her things. This made her to resent her mom for not being able to afford rich things, and now won't even talk to her. I understand this are individual examples but believe me i have WAY more that i wont bother to list here.
Dear dimples565: BY FAR THE COMMENT THAT ANNOYED ME THE MOST. What's to say that a 19 year old who has never been married can't be right about something he has never experienced? I can tell you that robbing a bank is wrong and that nobody should ever do it without actually having to rob a bank. Would you question me about my reasoning there even though i never robbed one???
You wrote "You want to quote part of the wedding vows fine but find out what the rest is. To love honor and cherish. THat means youmake yourself sexually available to your spouse. " I just want an explanation as to why the heck you think "to honor and cherish" means having sex with your spouse. Those words are meant that you are to respect and value highly of them, heck look up them in a dictionary sometime.
As far as " suffer more from divorce because there is no longer the income to provide for them the way it used to be". What a steaming pile of B.S. First off, do you really believe that all a parent does is provide money for their ??? Divorce effects WAY more than you could possibly of thought of. If you want proof, take a look at the facts: Divorce has DRAMATICALLY increased within the last few decades. Also, over the last few decades artist such as musicians, poets, and fine artists have been leaning toward a much more depressing feel. In fact, there has become an entire genre of "depressing i want to cut my wrists" type of people. Don't believe me? Try googling "emo" and see what you find.
Oh, and yes i know i don't make the laws in our states. But then again, who ever said that there needs to be laws written down for us to know what is right and wrong?
Dear ArealUnicorn: Another interesting debate. I can't say that no sex isn't SOME form of abuse, and yet there are virgins still out there who are into there 20's and 30's that i've heard about. They haven't killed themselves yet so i see that it can't be all that bad. As for "being turned down over and over again, i think i would rather be punched," i CAN actually image it, infact, i can do better than that. Do you have any idea how many times a man has gotten rejected b4? I know ive been rejected way more than i'd like to admit and yet i still keep on trying. The fact is that i think so much people sympathize that the irrationality of it all has dissappeared. I mean, i wrote this whole question to find at least ONE person who tried it all and had there relationship not work and still couldnt find one, yet i get a million people bitching to me about how i don't know how it feels because ive never experienced it so i shouldn't judge. It's about time, someone judged.
Dear Sweetpea202067: Sadly sweetpea, sex isn't a form of communication. Otherwise, everyone would at least know the name of the person they had sex with by the end of the night.
Dear WIzzyboiy: Wow, someone give this man an award. I finally found someone i can agree with completely. Glad to see this whole world hasn't gone crazy.
Dear 2daycowboywanted: "The wonders of being young. You may come to realize thatonce you get older you really didnt know all that much whenyou thought that you did." I guess everyone thinks they are living right when they are the ones living it. All i can say is that when we all were we lived without care and were happy. When we "matured" into the age that you all care to think is a respectable age most of your become depressed about one thing or another. However, when you look at all the wise elder people, they all seem happy. And when you ask them why they say that they never stopped acting like a . When you ask them who is the most ignorant people living they will say its the adults because they stress about things that aren't important in life. So i ask you, who is the smarter one? The happy older person who acts like a or the stressed out, sad adult?
Dear Daddysbadgirl38: "in all likelihood, you yourself will end up divorced from your mate at least once in your life". You must be a realist. Statistically, the odds are against me (what is it 60% divorced now??) but if today's society ever DOES regain its morals then hopefully it won't be so easy to divorce (and it IS easy to divorce, proof is how common people will divorce and then remarry, and then divorce...etc.) And for the last time...NO, my parents are not divorced...
Dear Optimystk43: I'm glad to hear that you agree with my debate. I'm sorry you had to grow up in a broken home, but at least you can attest to others the pain of growing up in one.
I'm sorry if i didnt get to comment about everyone. I felt a few things to be repetitive for me to say so i decided not to. Just know that i spent a long time carefully reading each individuals response and trying my best to see things from their point of view. I have to say though that I am extremely dissapointed that i could not find ONE person who tried all of the things mentioned on my article and still found luck. I take it that everyone on here that chose to respond with anger has been divorced at somepoint or another for the reason mentioned. This is not to say that non of these people tried to keep the relationship going...i think it only shows the true strength and passion of your love for your partner that you refused to attempt every possible way rekindle that spark that you left. I'm sorry that your relationship didnt work but all i can say is hopefully the next time you decide to get married (if you do) you will spend a little more time trying to pick your soulmate and maybe have a little more perserverance with it.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Kissing Cousins?????
|
Posted:Aug 20, 2006 6:36 pm
Last Updated:Jan 18, 2007 7:55 pm
6044 Views
|
Ok, the topic to this blog is slightly weirder than my usual ones (if thats possible). Im not quite sure how to word this either so bare with me:
So, i just came back from one of my cousin's weddings. Over there i met up w/ my grandma's sister (an old portuguese woman). Now my grandma's sister also happens to be the grandmother of a female friend of mine that i usually meet up w/ at all the family gatherings. So technically the woman i'm talking about is my 4th cousin(?), who for reading ease we'll call "Mandy" (not her real name). Anywayz, i was talking to my grandmother's sister about if Mandy was going to show up for this wedding or not. And it was then that my brother teased that Mandy and I were "Kissing Cousins," like back in the "old country (Portugal)". Nothing is unusual about this.
The weird part is that instead of my Grandma's sister laughing and saying something along the lines of "No" she says that "kissing cousins" is not just from the "old country" and that its perfectly fine. I am well aware that in my state a 4th cousins are legally allowed to marry, however i still find it absolutely weird to think about.
Progressively through the night, Mandy's grandparents constantly kept bringing her up. Maybe this was a was to establish a conversation, but after the conversation earlier in the day it just seemed awkward. They showed pictures of her to me, and kept saying how much they wished Mandy could have been there to see me...etc.
The even weirder part about this story is that i'm not exactly repulsed about the idea either. By all standards "Mandy" is a very attractive woman, who is only 2 years younger than me. So part of me wanted to actually think that it's ok to be w/ her. My brain tells me, that this is disgusting and for me to even think such things is to be thinking of .
In the end, i really don't plan on ever doing anything w/ my cousin, because i just see it as wrong. I just wonder if my cousin and her whole family seem to think the same way. I really don't know what she is thinking, i can only hope that the next time i do see "Mandy" she will be w/ a man, and i'll be with a woman so no situation can ever occur.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Falling in love w/ a close friend.
|
Posted:Aug 10, 2006 3:11 pm
Last Updated:Apr 27, 2024 4:44 pm
5885 Views
|
For some reason or another, i end up falling for one of my best female friends. This has happened repeatedly, and im sure is not uncommon. I don't really know what to do about it either. Logically i tell myself to ask out a woman before we become too close, but i never really get a crush on a girl until we have become extremely close. Im not sure if i should just ask out a girl if we've talked for a little while and i think she is cute or should i wait to find out her personality well first. It seems like the longer i wait to ask out a woman the more of myself i put at risk.
The reason why im wondering all this is because i asked out one of my really close female friends. I really liked her, physically and mentally but the whole thing was, i was never able to figure out if she liked me. So eventually i told her how i felt. But kinda like the worst way possible. I planed a whole way to tell her, but wut happened was i got drunk at a party i threw and told her while drunk (so my entire plan on how to tell her was lost). She ended up telling me that she didnt think of me that way. Later that night we hung out in my hot tub. She got REALLY drunk, and on a dare ended up taking off all her clothes (something that i would have never thought she would do) in front of my friends. SHe then proceded to flirt with everyone. This was the first time she met most of my friends, so now they all kinda see her as a whorish girl. Eventually my best friend and i ended up making out w/ her in the hot tub. At this point, all of us are drunk and now nude. It seemed kinda like she was feeling my friend more, but yet i was still making out w/ her and caressing her nude body and she did not try to stop me at all. The whole thing felt wrong. I didnt want to share her, but i didnt want to just let her spend all her attention on my best friend when i cared so much about her. This lasted all night as none of us even got to go to sleep (no sex was involved, neither my best friend or i liked the idea of having sex w/ the same girl at the time).
The next day i called her and told her, "i know that she has a crush on my best friend", she admitted it; and i told her that she can't date him. I know that seems wrong and harsh, but my friend and i have been best friends for years and her dating my best friend would make me resent my best friend (by the way, my best friend said he didnt realize that i had a crush on her and basically apologized for making out w/ her; even though yelled at me for not stopping him). The conversation ended by her being annoyed at me for telling her who she can date, but she did tell me she wouldnt date him if i don't want her too. However, and understandibly, we haven't talked in about 2 weeks, even though i have called her a few times since then. Do you think she doesnt want to be friends anymore? Should i just keep on trying to talk to her? I really dont want to lose a close friend out of this.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
Bachelorhood or Relationship?
|
Posted:Jun 26, 2006 11:08 pm
Last Updated:Jul 9, 2006 5:33 pm
5811 Views
|
Ok, so I'm back home from college for the summer. And since i've been home there has been A LOT of girls that seem to be flirting with me. The thing is, i've been single for a long time and i really just want to settle down for a while. I know though that if i do settle, i most likely would only be able to settle for the summer, as i would be moving back to college in September. So is creating a serious relationship worth it? Should i just stick w/ having flings until i get to college? I really dont like this whole spend a night(s) w/ one girl and never talk to them afterwards. However, it seems to be my only logical choice.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
My rant on girls my age and has the sanctitiy of sex diminished?
|
Posted:Jun 4, 2006 9:53 pm
Last Updated:Jul 15, 2007 12:48 am
5916 Views
|
Ok, this is starting to bug me. Ever girl i meet that is close to my age that i get to know ends up being incredibly stupid or immature. Like this one girl tells me her last ex-bf punched her in the face and choked her after having sex with her. WTF? How does she pick these guys? ive been friends with her for a while and we had a little fling before and she still likes me. I would almost date her but it seems like she has a whole string of Xs that are like this. So much so that i dont want anything to do with her cuz i dont want even want to be compared to those creeps. Another girl i liked starts arguements over anything and everything. She is fun to be around with because she is energetic but the second you do anything around her that she is not used to she flips out. She just cant control her emotions at all. It seems like the only girls that dont have issues that i meet end up being like 21 or older, and even then quite a bit of them still have a lot of issues.
Not to mention, im starting to feel like the only girls i see are whorish. Many of them "hook up" with guys for one night or maybe date for a week and then have a new guy a few days later. On a level i can relate to them, but i feel like i should be dating for an extended amount of time before i have sex with someone. Otherwise it is strictly oral. I think sex is an important thing that should be saved for someone you truely care about, not necessarily a soul mate but an important person in ur life. Besides having sex with people you barely know is just not safe, i dont care if you wear protection or not im still against it. Am I the only one that feels this way? Has the sancitity of sex diminished?
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
|
|
Here's my story so far...
|
Posted:May 13, 2006 1:44 pm
Last Updated:Dec 1, 2006 6:49 am
5939 Views
|
Ok, sorry here is my story so far...I've been single for quite a while now. I just cant take being single anymore either. I used to love going to the clubs with my friends too, but ever since my friends all got gfs they never want to go out anymore. So ive been stuck being a 5th wheel in their relationships. I dont know what to do anymore, because i dont want to go out alone.
The other thing that's really starting to bug me is that none of the girls i like seem to like me the same way, yet just about every girl i dont like, due to a huge problem in personality and/or looks, gets a crush on me. Sometimes i think i should just settle with one of those girls that likes me, but i think it's wrong to go into a relationship with someone that you weren't interesting in to begin with.
|
|
|
0
Comments
|
|
To link to this blog (TheRox333) use [blog TheRox333] in your messages.
|
|
|
| Sun |
Mon |
Tue |
Wed |
Thu |
Fri |
Sat |
| |
|
|
|
|
1
|
2
|
3
|
4
|
5
|
61
|
71
|
8
|
9
|
10
|
11
|
12
|
13
|
14
|
15
|
16
|
17
|
18
|
19
|
20
|
21
|
22
|
23
|
24
|
25
|
26
|
27
|
28
|
29
|
30
|
|
