of course....
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Posted:Jan 3, 2016 12:22 am
Last Updated:Jun 22, 2022 12:59 am
12573 Views
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New Year, time to get myself back in the game. So, I was checking my notifications, and I found a man I was very interested in had flirted with me. So, I go to check out his profile, only to find it off. I'm so very disappointed. I hope he comes back to the site, I'd really love a chance to talk with him. His pic made him look like a very interesting Man.
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Have you ever...
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Posted:Aug 22, 2015 4:51 pm
Last Updated:Jan 2, 2016 11:21 pm
15188 Views
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...read an email that had you so close to cumming, without even touching yourself? I was recently cleaning out my email and came across some old letters. Holy fuck, they were hot. And they brought back memories of fabulous sex!! I took a chance and sent a text to the guy who I'd been emailing, thinking I was probably being foolish. I really didn't expect to hear from him, but he replied. We talked about the old emails, the old times, the fabulous years of sex.
The entire time I was squirming in my chair, turned on and about 3 seconds away from cumming. All I needed was a slight push...*beep* new text. It was a picture, I fucking came right there! I've never done that before!! All of the talk about sex and whether or not I'd faked any orgasms (I hadn't btw) and the memory of my best orgasm, was just enough coupled with that pic to send me over the edge. Plus, I haven't fucked anyone in a while (my choice).
The reason I'd felt confident in texting him is because I'd run into him a few weeks prior, and I had gotten some interest from him. I am all for hooking up again, he's hot, he's great in bed and he's responsible for some of my best sex memories. I would like to make a bunch more...starting with sex in a few places a little risky. 
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Can we?
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Posted:Mar 14, 2015 12:32 am
Last Updated:Aug 22, 2015 4:33 pm
19086 Views
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I've always been told that men and women can't be friends. They are either in a relationship or they aren't. I don't believe that. I have plenty of guy friends. I love each and every one of them, but I don't want to date them, and most I wouldn't even consider having sex with because we're friends. (And many of my male friends are hot) Yet we're able to be friends...and the one or two guys that I'm friends with and have slept with, things are still cool. They know I'm not looking for more from them, I only want an occasional good time. And to be clear, it's my choice to not offer up the option of not having sex with my male friends. One response was that I must be ugly if none of the men want to have sex with me. Nowhere in this blog did I say they didn't. There has been interest from some, but as much as I love sex, I just wasn't feeling it with those particular men. I've got a pretty face, but I'm bigger than most guys are interested in...they just don't know what they're missing lol.
Then there are guys that I've hooked up with and apparently they believe that I'm not capable of being friends with someone I'm having sex with. That's actually what I'm looking for. A friend that I'm comfortable with. I can let loose and not be all nervous. But the guys I've met in the past year seem to think I want more. Nothing I say gets through to them. They have been nice enough guys, and I've been lucky, most of them were fabulous in bed, but they are guys I know I can't date. I went let myself go there. I just want sex. I don't want to continually meet new men. I want to find a few guys I'm comfortable with and have fun with them.
When they seem to be cool with the friends thing, then ignore me and treat me as if I don't exist, I have a problem with that. I have all of these thoughts going through my head. "Am I that horrible?" I know I'm not, but sometimes the thoughts pop up.
Do you think men and women can exist as friends, even with sex, and not ruin the friendship? I do. Even when the sex ends, I've been able to maintain some friendships.
I guess I'm just disappointed. There are a few guys that I enjoyed sex with and felt they could be guys I could be friends with, only to be brushed off. I don't know why. I didn't want more than friendship and sex, but I guess even that was too much. Since the seeming rejections, I've found myself having a hard time allowing myself to meet new guys. I want to have sex, but my trust in guys and myself is pretty low at this point.
I'll get over it, it's just frustrating when a guy deems me ok to fuck, but not good enough to be friends with. Lol it's pretty sad, because a couple of the men were guys I could see myself talking sports with. But I have impressed a couple of my newer guy friends with my knowledge of sports, baseball in particular. So I'm good. Hee not one I can have sex with, even though he's hotter than hell...he's married, so I'd never cross that line. We'll be sports buddies, and I'm fine with that. Even add hot as he is, if he was single, I still don't think I'd want to have sex with him. I'm very selective of who I get into bed with. And if you get a repeat invitation, I truly enjoyed the first encounter.
Anyways...guess it's time to open myself up to new friendships. I say men and women can be friends...you?
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50 shades....
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Posted:Mar 6, 2015 1:08 pm
Last Updated:Mar 6, 2015 2:15 pm
18290 Views
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So, what's your stance on 50 shades of gray? Are you into it? Does it turn you wan? I admit, I really don't know anything about the book, I didn't read it. Nor have I gone to see the movie. And I don't plan to. BDSM isn't really my thing. I think something like that takes a lot of trust, which I have issues with. Don't get me wrong, I'm not opposed to certain aspects of it, just not complete, full-blown BDSM sex.
I am mostly submissive, but I won't fully submit, or at least I haven't met any man that's made me want to fully submit. If you are into BDSM, which side of it are you, the dominant, the submissive… I guess I need to learn more about it. But just from the outside looking in, it doesn't seem like something that I can get into.
If you're into it, maybe you can help me understand…
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The big Valentine's Day....Cupid's arrow missed
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Posted:Feb 10, 2015 9:48 pm
Last Updated:Feb 22, 2015 1:52 am
19313 Views
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I think this is the first time in a long time that I actually haven't been truly interested in any one single man. I'm mean, there are men that I think are hot, but not one that peaks my interest enough to want to date. There is only one guy that has even come close, I know he's out of my league. I see him quite often, and I can talk to him quite easily, actually, but it seems his type woman is pretty much my polar opposite. It's kind of funny that I'm even partially interested in him. Don't get me wrong, he's very attractive, actually he is really hot. But he doesn't have that sense of humor I like or a love of sports that I would like in a man. And I have no idea what he wants sexually. I think part of the reason that I might even be halfway interested in him, is that he is a mystery to me. My own little Rubik's cube of manhood, if you will. I want to know what makes him tick.
Not that this is different than any other Valentine's Day I've celebrated, but I will be celebrating this one alone. Shocker. I've been trying to tell myself it's just like any other day. And it really is. As long as I stay home, maybe I will not be reminded of my singleness. It would be nice to have someone to distract me, but circumstances will prevent that.
If you are single, what do you do on Valentine's Day? Do you have any anti-Valentine's Day traditions? Or do you just treat it like any other day? I don't dare go out for supper. And I don't know if I'm even going to dare going out for drinks… too many lovey-dovey couples will be on the loose. And I'll be sitting there glaring at them… LOL… Knowing that they're going to be going home later that evening probably to ravage each other, while I'll be going home alone, again… Joy.
It's cool, I've got a box full of toys yet to be tested…
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Distraction
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Posted:Feb 8, 2015 6:15 pm
Last Updated:Oct 18, 2015 10:07 pm
19436 Views
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So I've been trying to keep myself distracted for the last couple weeks and the continuing next couple of weeks. But I can't always keep myself busy, I still have too much time to think. I think about Loved ones lost. Another year passing and not knowing what I'm doing with my life. And another year of not allowing anyone to get too close to me. Maybe it's just that I don't know who I want or what I want. But I actually think it's more that I don't want to be hurt again.
Maybe it's time to open myself up though. But I'm not sure I'm ready for a relationship. I don't even really know what I want. Or who. I guess I just want to guy that likes sports, some travel, sex of course, and and a big girl like me. A sense of humor goes along way with me, too. If I had to choose between a really good looking guy and a funny guy, more than likely the funny guy is gonna win every time. I want someone that will treat his mom nice, but isn't a mama's boy. Someone that's easy to talk to, just hang out with, do things with.
Recently, I had a "friend" tell me all of things that that she thought were wrong with me. That was a fun conversation. I guess part of my problem is that I accept people how they are. If I was with someone and I thought they needed to change, that would be my problem not theirs. You don't get with someone and then try to change them. But for the most part I like who I am. I know I'm a funny girl, I love sports, you obviously know I love sex, and I would do anything for those that I love, whether it be friends, family or significant other. But, part of me thinks that maybe it's too late. Maybe I'm too old. If I'm so wonderful how have I gotten to this age without a relationship that has lasted longer than five months?
I've also met some people that I allowed to treat me badly, and I have accepted it. I don't think I ask for too much when it comes to the site. I just want to find a guy or two for some good sex. A guy I am comfortable with, have fun, and be friends with. I don't want someone that just ignores me when I'm in convenient for them to know.
I was friends with a man for five years, and by friends I mean "friends with benefits." And now he's got a girlfriend. I don't know if he thinks that if we talk or if we remained just friends, that everyone would figure out that we had slept together for five years or what. During the five years we were friends, I was discreet. But I also felt that we were friends. I think I deserve better than the way he's treating me now. I miss my friend. I miss talking to him, I miss the advice he could give me when I found a man that I was interested in. I miss the fun conversations we've had. I was comfortable with him. But it wasn't more than friendship and sex. It wasn't a relationship, because i wouldn't allow myself to go that far, because I knew that wasn't what he wanted either. Or, it is quite possible that he doesn't want people to know that he slept with a fat chick for five years. And that's a shame, because I know he enjoyed it. And of course I miss sex with him. It was always fabulous. He's the one that's responsible for one of the best orgasm of my life. So yes, I do miss the sex, but I do miss my friend.
I know at this point I'm just kind of rambling, but I have so many thoughts in my head that I just wanted to get them down. I just don't know where I'm going from here. Maybe it's time to step away from the site...
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Only yesterday...
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Posted:Jan 20, 2015 9:30 pm
Last Updated:Apr 29, 2024 3:4 am
19478 Views
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Where the hell did the last year go? I swear, I blinked and it was gone!! Do the years seem to go by much faster the older you get?
Last year at this time I was really struggling with anger, sadness and melancholy. I lashed out at people that most likely didn't deserve it. I picked fights about stupid shit. This year, so far, I've made a conscious effort to not do that. So far, so good. I guess part of me is afraid that anyone I let near me, I'm going to lose by the end of February. (Irrational and morbid, I know) But I've lost a lot of loved ones from end of January til late Feb. ( my grandma, my best friend, and two other very good friends.) That's a lot to deal with. And all of them were relatively young. I've been telling myself that's irrational, and I've been a whole lot better than last year at this time. I haven't picked any fights, I've generally been happier. It's been nice.
I think it's because I have someone in my life that I can totally be myself around. They love me just as I am...sexual tendencies and all. I met this person last March, and the last 10 months have been pretty great. We have the same naughty humor, the same love of sex, and enjoy a lot of the and things. No, it's not a boyfriend or man. It's a woman, and we have become best friends. We cheer each other when we're down, we go out and get crazy, and we have each other's back if need be. If she were a man, I'd be all over her. Lol
But I'm glad to have her around. She seems to be a good influence on my mood. 
So, if any of you were on the receiving end of my moodiness last January/February, I apologise...
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New Year's eve
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Posted:Dec 28, 2014 7:50 pm
Last Updated:Dec 29, 2014 9:44 pm
17742 Views
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This is my plan. I plan to rent a hotel room near the bars where I plan to party. But I'm not sure if I'll have company in that room. Lately, the men I've been meeting have been from out of town. Well I really shouldn't say lately, because the last man I met was quite a while ago. I think the reason for this, is because I had trouble with non-discreet men. I've met men on here, locally, and we've had some fun, and then when we're out in public he outs me as being on this site. Which I know I shouldn't be ashamed or embarrassed about, but I really don't think anyone needs to know my sexual business. But for once, I want this New Year's eve to be different. I want someone to kiss at midnight. I want someone to have sex with all night long. I want to start this year off on a different note...a good note. if I didn't have to work the next day, I'd probably go to town and celebrate new year's eve.
Your plans?
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Guys...input please?
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Posted:Dec 27, 2014 3:45 pm
Last Updated:Nov 23, 2015 10:54 pm
17030 Views
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I have a friend. She's an amazing person. She's highly sexual, she's pretty, she's thin and she's a kick to be around. So, what would put a guy off from approaching this type of woman in the bar. She doesn't act like a slut or anything, but I still don't understand why guys aren't approaching her.
What stops a man from approaching a woman in a bar or public setting? What peaks his interest enough to approach a woman in a bar?
The woman I described isn't me. I'm just trying to understand what makes a man approach a woman in a public setting.
I just see this beautiful woman that men don't approach, and think if she doesn't get approached, what chance in hell do I have of getting approached?
Do we have to act like sluts? We're always laughing and having a good time. We always talk to anyone that approaches in a friendly manner. And we've even been known to flirt.
We are both alike, in that we love sex.
So, what gives guys? What are you looking for when you're out in a public setting? Like a bar?
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Tis the season…
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Posted:Dec 9, 2014 10:53 pm
Last Updated:Dec 27, 2014 3:26 pm
16919 Views
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Yes, it's the holidays. And since I don't get to spend mine with my family, I'm a little bit bummed. I've been trying to keep myself busy, to keep my mind off of it. But I'm also trying to make plans for New Year's eve. I tend to like to spend my time downtown somewhere. The last few years, I rented a hotel room downtown so I wouldn't have to drive home on New Year's Eve night. The only unfortunate thing is I usually end up spending the night alone in that hotel room. But it's my own fault. I'm sort of preoccupied with one or two guys that I really kind of like. Don't worry guys, they're not from the site.
Plus, I've sort of fallen back into my old ways. The shyness seems to have overtaken me again. And I find myself only truly comfortable with guys that I've been with before. I'm having a really hard time trying to get myself to meet new guys.
I still haven't found a guy to try out any of my items on. And I know one gentleman mentioned cock rings. I have access to those, too. So that makes it arousal creams, massage oils, both edible and just plain massage oil, cock rings, toys, some whip things. Ask me, and I probably have it. And I'm more than likely willing to try them out. When I first moved to Billings, I met this Woman, and she was very sexually open. And this is when I discovered that I kind of like a light whipping.
I've been toying with the idea of asking the former FWB if he's single and maybe interested in starting things back up again. I see him around and still find myself attracted to him. That's not shocking. We were FWB's for five years. He's the one responsible for my most amazing orgasm ever. Should I?
What are your plans for New Year's Eve?
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Lube, arousal cream, enhancers, and other things in bed
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Posted:Nov 23, 2014 11:29 pm
Last Updated:Aug 15, 2019 1:05 pm
17574 Views
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Has anyone here ever tried any of the stuff? I have access to all of this stuff right now, and I'm curious to try some of it but I don't know how other people feel about trying this stuff in bed. What do you think? What would you think about a woman bringing this up while you're in bed? Would you be game?
I didn't realize how many different items they were like this. Anal ease, edible massage creams and oils, throat numbing sprays for giving head, and the list goes on. I want to try some of the stuff. I'm really interested in trying to the penis cream, I want to use the arousal creams, just to see if it does actually intensify the sexual experience. Do you think it does?
I think I want to have the type of sexual experience where it's not just a wham bam thank you ma'am experience. But an experience that would last the afternoon and into the evening, maybe into the next morning. I'm only looking for friends with benefits but who says a friend with benefits can't explore something like that? I want to give a . I want to spend time giving head. Worshipping a dick. Really pleasuring a guy. Leave a trail of pleasure dust on my body, letting him lick and nibble his way around my body.
Would you guys be open to this?
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idk
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Posted:Oct 5, 2014 11:22 pm
Last Updated:Dec 2, 2014 12:12 am
16729 Views
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Do you ever wonder when things might start to go your way? I'm not trying to be negative, I'm just questioning some things.
Mr. Friend-zone has pretty much confirmed that I'm not for him to date. Hell, right now it's looking like no longer even friends. Maybe he got off on stringing me along for a while. Fun to have someone around whoencourages you, hangs out when no one else does, but doesn't overstep. I always told him I never wanted to be a pain or bother.
I was out recently. Remember how he used to always come say hi, hug me, hang out, and what not? Not anymore. It's as if I don't exist. He was out and pretty much looked right through me. I'm hard to miss, I'm a big girl. Of course he was with some little snookie-haired girls, so who needs your useless friend around? So, I sent a few texts today, he replied to one, with some random stuff, and I haven't heard from him since. I'm beginning to realize it was a one sided friendship.
Ok, yes, I'm apparently having a pity party. It just sucks when I let people make me feel like I'm not good enough. On paper, I'm one amazing woman. I love sports, absolutely love sex, would do anything for my loved ones, can cook and bake. I'm not a fancy girl. I don't need expensive gifts or a man with loads of money. If he has a job and can support himself, I'm happy. This right here...this is why I don't date. We weren't even dating and I got hurt. I think it's worse, because I did actually think we were friends.
I almost think I'm an after thought to some of my "friends."
I think it's time to hibernate for a while. Pull the shell a little closer around me, start building the walls back up. Start treating people the way they treat me. Indifference won't get me hurt.
Good night...Pity party is moving to my bed and some zombie movies or something.
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Again...
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Posted:Sep 26, 2014 11:04 am
Last Updated:Dec 2, 2014 12:10 am
14558 Views
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I've landed in the dreaded "friend-zone." Again.
I met a man a couple of months ago that I kind of broke my own rules for. I went developed a huge crush on him. I thought the feelings were returned. When we are around each other, he seems to take care of me. Makes sure I'm safe, holds my hand. But in all of the time we've known each other, he's never made a move, other than to hug me like a long lost friend every time we see each other. We used to hang out quite often, but the last time we hung out, he started to say something, then just stopped. "From the time I met you, I knew..." and then nothing. Nothing I said could get him to complete that sentence. Even if it was something I didn't want to hear, it would have been better than just stopping. I have discussed this with friends of both sexes and there are mixed feelings as to what they think he was going to say. My male friends seem to think he was trying to say he likes me. My female friends seem to think he was trying to let me down gently.
I don't play games. He has my phone number, and knows where to find me. But I truly believe if he was interested, he wouldn't go 2 weeks without talking to me.
Guess it's just not in the cards for me to find that special one. Guess I'll just get a couple of dogs and call it good. I can't get cats...I'm a person.
But sex is still in the cards...or it had better be, or I'm going to need a shitload of batteries...lol
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To link to this blog (shysexual_MTgirl) use [blog shysexual_MTgirl] in your messages.
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