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Those emotion things.
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Those emotion things. This post is only viewable by LesbianPersonals members. Join LesbianPersonals now! |
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You can't realy choose who you love or fall in love with but you can be logical and honest about those feelings. This doesn't suggest you are conciously out looking to replace a present lover. You haven't done anything to your life that will not happen again and again until you've actually sit down and defined just what it is you want in life. Fortunately, at 21, you're still learning what you like and don't like. It will become unfortunate should you turn 25, 30, 40... and never really decided what your looking for or what you are willing to do to achieve those goals. It sounds like career advice but it applies to relationships too. Too few women ever really consider the strategic ends to life and relationships - they simply follow thier heart, emotions and feelings letting faith lead their decisions. This may be why there is a 50% divorce rate. Life is full of risk and the one all women should consider is being able to stand alone, on their own without the support of a man that she may become dependent on for more than just a relationship. Meaning, you should be able to support yourself (in many ways) before relying on someone else. Only then can a man or woman discover a relationship for what it is meant to be. Considering your best friend. Is he really a best friend if he is applying pressures on you to be with him? A real best friend would not be so selfish and provide 100% support for the relationship you already have. If he is so clear in his thinking and can see that this may not the right man for you, then he would see what you do need in a man and guide you along those lines - without interjecting himself into your emotions and intimate desires. Perhaps loosing both of them may be the right thing for you at this time.
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I have to agree with professornaught. You are very young and we evolve so much with time. We as women constantly change our wants and needs. One thing you need to do, is figure out who you are without each of them. No relationship can truly survive if you feel there's something more. I'll be honest with you, at your age I had just that. A loving man that knew everything about me, and accepted me without repairs. I refer to him as the sweetest love I've known. I've never had that feeling again. I've never met a man that unconditional with me. And it is something to be missed. But you shouldn't stay with him just to be safe. He deserves to be loved the way he loves you.
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I wish you the best in whatever choice you make, Im not even gonna try suggest an answer, thats for you to come to alone, but regret nothing I will say to you, whatever the outcome life has a funny way of just keeping going ?
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Remember this.......there is no right or wrong decision. Life is what you make of it and eventually the decisions you make will lead you towards the finished canvas. You cant make yourself sick over things which you cant control. As I've said in the past and others here have commented, your young, evolving, exploring and these are feelings of uncertainty you have are natural.
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