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Snaked, Baked, And Slurpeed To A Pee
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Snaked, Baked, And Slurpeed To A Pee As I looked down I noticed the hole was dark, wet, and ready for my tool. I lowered myself and fed it into that orifice, deeper and deeper, at one point feeling resistance, I pushed and fed more and more, amazed at how deep I was going. When I could go no further, I gyrated and twisted, pushing in and out, deeper, harder, back and forth, faster, then slower, working a sporadic rhythm feeling the wetness occasionally hitting my legs. After 20 minutes, I pulled completely out, sat back, catching my breath before starting over. Unknown to me, the 3rd round was to be the climatic finale, at one point pulling out hard I noticed an eruption as all the wetness splattered, then disappeared, revealing a clear sewer line. I sat back on the plant pot, totally satisfied, and smoked an imaginary, celebratory cigarette in my mind. After a few minutes, I stuffed the "snake" back on the receiver, rolled up the cord, and stashed it into the garage. Time for a shower. A long shower felt good, after the previous days short shower with the drain plug set, so as not to flood the house. After getting dressed I really wanted something cold to drink, so off to the Ice House. The drive was an opportunity to "free my mind" without stinking up the house. "Cheech and Chonging" to the store left me staring at bottle after bottle of beverages, when I spotted some orange Fanta that looked good. I bought 2, but even as I was paying I knew this wasn't what I was wanting, I wanted a Slurpee. Off to the 11 of 7. I sat in my truck in the parking lot, repeatedly giving myself a brain freeze until it was nearly gone. Unsated, I bought a 2nd, drove towards home, stopped and looked at some puppies, American Wolf Hound something or other. Cute, but I'm only wanting small dogs, since my over weight Lab died and I had a time getting her in my van to take her for cremation. Once home, I Slurpeed till I was nearly sick. It wasn't long before Slurpee had it's revenge. I think Slurpee is French for "peeing out your butt". It had been years since I'd had a Slurpee, it's gonna be years before I want another. But(t) I can honestly say, both my "sewer lines" are clear. How long's it been since YOU had a Slurpee? Well neighbor, that's too long! |
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6/2/2018 3:40 pm |
Slurpee's Revenge: A blast from your ass! 
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xxxxxxx
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Oh lord dear, you need to get laid. You turned sewage cleaning into a sex scene. Or........maybe I need to get laid cause I fell for it. 
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6/2/2018 4:37 pm |
xxxxxxx
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6/2/2018 4:41 pm |
Oh lord dear, you need to get laid. You turned sewage cleaning into a sex scene. Or........maybe I need to get laid cause I fell for it.
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I saw the sewer thing coming butt not the Slurpee. God you cleared your mind before you hind. Last Slur-peeee was when I was in L.A. so 1980s. When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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mmmmmm, slurpee
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6/2/2018 7:00 pm |
I saw the sewer thing coming butt not the Slurpee. God you cleared your mind before you hind. Last Slur-peeee was when I was in L.A. so 1980s.
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6/2/2018 7:01 pm |
mmmmmm, slurpee
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6/2/2018 7:16 pm |
Hahahahaha troll-ing? This place is thick with trolls.
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80's???? That's way too long! When the going gets weird, the weird turn pro. The only thing we have to fear is fear itself.
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6/2/2018 7:46 pm |
The though of getting Slur-poo after I Slurpee is gonna make the next one even further down the line. 
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I had one of those frozen ones a couple of months ago.I would say it was a reasonable facsimile. Do they still serve them with a stroon an implement similar to the classic spork! I heard there was a deadly accident at the Isle of man This last wednesday.Sadly ! Using more than all the road!
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6/2/2018 9:10 pm |
I had one of those frozen ones a couple of months ago.I would say it was a reasonable facsimile. Do they still serve them with a stroon an implement similar to the classic spork! I heard there was a deadly accident at the Isle of man This last wednesday.Sadly !
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It's been year since I had a slurpee, I get a brain freeze just thinking about them. I wonder if adding booze would help with the brain freeze.
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6/2/2018 9:45 pm |
It's been year since I had a slurpee, I get a brain freeze just thinking about them. I wonder if adding booze would help with the brain freeze. 
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No words.   
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I've never had a Slurpee. They don't sell them by that name around here. What we do have are called Slush Puppy's . I can't recall when I had one last either. I never really went for them, the whole brain freeze thing sort of put me off.
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6/3/2018 5:36 am |
No words. 
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6/3/2018 5:39 am |
I've never had a Slurpee. They don't sell them by that name around here. What we do have are called Slush Puppy's . I can't recall when I had one last either. I never really went for them, the whole brain freeze thing sort of put me off.
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Well...I snorted when I laughed. Very unlady-like and I'm really glad to be home alone. I cannot remember the last time I had a slurpee (or an icee for that matter). It's probably been since the 80's. "Sometimes the most productive thing you can do is relax." – Mark Black
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This had me laughing. I kinda thought your "snake" might not be a part of your anatomy, but the visual that went with your description....Ugh! Glad I didn't have to see the mess! lol I don't think I've had an Icee since the late 90s. I don't believe I've ever had one clean my "sewer line" in quite the same manner! Pagan  Hmmmm....I know I left that wand around here somewhere!
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I laugh so hard when I was reading this ty hugs V Become a blog watcher sweet_vm
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Last time I had a Slurpee (from 7-11), was about 2 months ago. I always have to be careful, because too big a suck on the straw brings on a burning "throat freeze". I've never heard of the side affect you experience - probably because it takes me so long to actually finish the drink. Check out my profile or and become a "watcher" of my blog FMAOPLS,to learn more about me, and for intelligent, lively, smartassy and fun discussion, with a little irreverence thrown in. "Like" or comment on my photos, and I promise I'll add more. Thanks.
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6/3/2018 3:12 pm |
Well...I snorted when I laughed. Very unlady-like and I'm really glad to be home alone. I cannot remember the last time I had a slurpee (or an icee for that matter). It's probably been since the 80's.
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